


Can We Have It All

by irinokat



Category: Pacific Rim
Genre: Alternate Universe - Rock Band, M/M, Secret Identity
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-05
Updated: 2013-12-17
Packaged: 2017-12-31 14:23:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1032726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/irinokat/pseuds/irinokat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rockstar!AU. Newton Geiszler is the famous lead singer of the Black Velvet Rabbits, one of the biggest bands in the world. Hermann Gottlieb is a big fan, down on his luck. When Newt meets him and realizes Hermann has no idea who he is, he wonders if this is his chance to have everything he ever wanted.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. T-Minus 5

**Author's Note:**

  * For [iraya](https://archiveofourown.org/users/iraya/gifts).



> Written for Iraya because her ideas and comics are so friggin' cute. Sorry this first chapter is so short, hopefully will have more up in the next few days.

“Newt! You’re on in five minutes, get your ass out of the damn dressing room!”

“It’ll be fine, Tendo!” Newt shouted back as he readjusted his custom rabbit-print tie for the thousandth time. Nothing like a homecoming show to make him nervous – not that anyone knew it was his hometown. Boston and his mask were big enough to hide him, even here. He slipped the mask on, smiling, his mouth the only feature visible under the stylized rabbit’s face. He ran his fingers through his hair one last time, making sure it all stuck up in the purposely messy style he’d become known for.

“Newt, if you are not out of this door in the next –” Tendo yelped as Newt opened the door on him, nearly whacking him in the face. “Would you get your act together on time for once?”

“That’s what I’m about to do!” Newt said as he jogged down the hallway, practically skipping as the pre-show adrenaline kicked in. “And remember, it’s NG backstage!” he shouted over his shoulder.

“That nickname is too stupid! I refuse!”

“Then figure something else out, man!” Newt turned his head just in time to slam into someone else’s back. After nearly losing his own footing, he bent down and caught the poor guy just before his face hit the floor. “Sorry, dude, in a bit of a hurry here.”

“Would you watch where you’re going?” the man snapped in a raspy British accent as he regained his footing, hand on one leg as if he’d fallen on it. Newt blinked; he hadn’t hurt the guy, had he? The man looked up at his face and went pale. His next words came out shaky. “I – I’m s-sorry, I didn’t –”

“Nah, you’re good, man, I’m the asshole.” Newt smiled at him. Some kind of groupie, most likely. He was cute, despite the atrocious haircut – who really buzzed their sides like that with their hair that short? “Let me make up for that.” Newt leaned into him and pecked him on the lips. The man gave a startled whine. Oops. Maybe he wasn’t a groupie… But when Newt pulled away, he simply looked dazed, not angry or hurt. “Hope you like the show!” Newt said, running again. Now he really would be late. Ah well, not unusual.

Jin elbowed him in the ribs as he went for his first guitar, a beautiful custom purple Les Paul. At least, Newt thought it was Jin. It was hard to tell the triplets apart even when they weren’t wearing their masks. “Only ten minutes late, new record!” Shit, it was Hu.

“Oh shut up,” Newt said.

“Are you guys ready yet?” someone yelled at them in a weird accent. Newt looked up to see a young redhead holding a clipboard.

“Might be!” Newt turned to Hu. “Who’s that?”

“Tendo’s new assistant, Chuck… Chuck what’s-his-face.” Hu watched Jin, Raleigh, and Cheung slip out onto the stage, the crowd roaring as they took their positions.  
“We pick him up at the Sydney show?”

“Something like that.” Hu slapped him on the back. “Come on, let’s go!”

Newt grinned. “Got it.” He watched Hu and counted to ten, trying not to laugh when he saw Chuck counting down on his fingers. New guy was nervous, apparently. He purposely waited until Chuck’s face had gone red and the kid looked like he was about to scream, then ran past him. “Relax, kid, have fun!”

Newt slid onto stage, stopping himself a few feet back from his mic. He fumbled the guitar’s strap over his back, careful not to catch it on any of the buttons on his vest, listening to the crowd’s cheers and screams, the loudest response yet. He smiled wide. This was always the best part, hearing everyone excited to see him. He took a deep breath before he stepped up and grabbed the mic. “Good evening, Boston!” The crowd shouted a wordless response. Full stadium. Shit. “We are the Black Velvet Rabbits, and we are about to fucking rock you!”


	2. Just a Small Town Boy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woo, sorry for the long break! Had finals and some other writing obligations to take care of. This story should update more often now. Apologies in advance for any weird formatting or typos, I had to write and post this on an iPad. I'll fix any problems once I get back to my computer.

"Fuck yeah, awesome gig!" Newt shouted as he slid into the dressing room, ears still ringing. He popped out his ear plugs as the others joined him. The last gig of a tour was always either amazing or terrible, depending on how tired the band was, and playing a hometown show always amped Newt up.

"And now we get a break," Hu sighed as he stripped off his mask. "I will not miss you," he said to the cartoony rabbit-shaped plastic.

"Ah, come on, they aren't that bad," Newt said, but his mask was off two seconds later. He wiped his red, sweaty face off with a towel before wiping out the mask.

"Yeah, they are," Jin said, throwing his sweat-soaked towel at the back of Newt's head. "When can we get rid of these things already?"

"They're half our appeal!" Newt squeaked, annoyed.

"You're just saying that because you designed them."

"Well, yeah, duh," Newt said, "I'm a fuckin' genius, but come on, the fans go crazy trying to figure out who we are. And isn't it nice to walk down the street without getting mobbed by groupies?"

"It'd be nice to get recognized for my work for once," Hu groused.

"Trust me, fame ain't that great."

"Easy for you to say, boy genius," Raleigh said, twirling his own towel into a rat-tail and snapping Newt on the back with it.

"Hey!" Newt yelped. "You should take it from the guy with experience, being famous isn't that fun."

Jin shrugged. "Maybe not for prodigy science nerds."

Newt threw his own towel at Jin. Pretty soon the dressing room was a mess of flying and snapping towels and pillows. They were stopped by a pissed off, shouting voice. "Guys!" Tendo yelled. "Clean your shit up and get outta here! We don't want these guys charging us for shit!"

Newt sighed, lowering the towel he had been aiming at Tendo's head. "Yes, Mom."

"Ha ha," Tendo said, unamused. "Change your clothes and take showers when you get home, you guys stink."

"Will do, man, never woulda thought of that," Raleigh said, snapping Tendo on the ass.

"Yeah yeah," Tendo said, rolling his eyes. "Good tour, we'll debrief later. Now get your asses goin'!"

Newt was glad to change from his soaked stage clothes into jeans and a t-shirt. It sucked to lose the height his stage boots gave him, but at least sneakers were easy to walk in. Newt gave his face one last wipe before grabbing his messenger bag and his suitcase and heading out to the parking lot. Originally he'd been planning on heading out with Raleigh, whose brother was waiting for them in the back of the parking lot. Once he'd put his suitcase in the trunk, though, he spotted a figure getting out of a car across the lot. In the dim street lights lining the lot, it was hard to see his face, but Newt thought he recognized the skinny, hunched frame. And he looked so sad, all frail and leaning against his car, that Newt just had to go see what was up. He yelled, "Be back in a minute!" over his shoulder as he jogged away.

"Hey dude, what's up?" he asked as he came upon the figure. He was right, it was the stranger he'd kissed before the show. The man looked bewildered, and for a moment, Newt was worried that he'd recognized him before he remembered the mask. This guy shouldn't know him from Adam. Which would explain his confusion. "Car break down?"

The man let out a long breath. "No, but my cell phone died and I'm worried..." He stopped. Newt could see why he was concerned. The car looked twenty years old and on its last limbs. Getting stuck on the way home at 2 AM would suck.

"Want me to come with?" Newt knew it was probably the wrong thing to say the second it came out of his mouth, but the poor guy was shivering in his parka, looking absolutely wretched. He gave Newt a suspicious look. "Aw, dude, from one fan to another, c'mon, only super-awesome people love BVR." The man let out a harsh laugh at that, one with little humor in it. "I live near the university, you can just drop me off near campus and -"

"Did you know I was an MIT student?" the man asked, alarmed. He relaxed a bit when Newt pointed out the student ID hanging from a clip on the guy's jacket pocket - dorky but cute, Newt decided. "...I'm not totally comfortable with this," he said, "but I suppose it'll work."

"Cool!" Newt pointed behind him. "Just let me go tell my friends..." He squinted at the ID. "Hermann. I'm Newt, be back in a sec."

He raced back to Yancy's SUV. "Hey, sorry to bail but this dude needs backup."

"You know him?" Raleigh asked. "He's MIT and a fan, he's good people," Newt said, shrugging.

Yancy and Raleigh exchanged a look. Newt could swear they were mind readers; they could have whole conversations just with lip movements and eyebrow twitches. Raleigh turned back to him. "What about your stuff?"

"Pick it up later, nothin' I can't buy or go without for a few nights." Newt walked away, waving, knowing he was being kind of a dick, but needing to know more about this Hermann guy and just what about him it was that Newt found attractive.


	3. Oh, Where Do We Begin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry again for how long this took! I had this done a few days ago, but an app crash took out half my file. I think this version turned out better anyhow. I'm gonna try to keep this updated once or twice a week from now on, hold me to that.

The drive was surprisingly quiet at first. Newt was exhausted, from the concert in part but mainly just the grind of the tour, and his throat was sore from singing. He didn't sound too hoarse, but he didn't want to push himself too much right now. It also quickly became clear that Hermann was not a talker, at least when he was nervous. Newt could see how unnaturally straight his back was, how his arms didn't bend to grip the wheel or his hands move much at all when he turned. Was the guy normally this tense, or was it him? He had to loosen him up.

"So, big fan?" Newt asked, trying to sound casual.

Hermann said, "Yes." Newt waited for more, but nothing else came.

"How long?"

"Unfortunately, I didn't hear about them until after they got big. And I don't exactly get to see them often."

"Why not?"

"Too expensive." Hermann stared straight ahead, only turning his head to check his blind spots, never looking at Newt, never saying more than he needed to. "Too much to do."

"That sucks. I'm sorry, man."

"What do you do with them?"

"Huh?" Newt was surprised he'd asked a question.

"I saw you with a suitcase. Do you work for them?"

"Yeah, uh," Newt thought for a moment, shit, he should have realized that was weird, "I'm - I'm a roadie. I help unload their stuff, y'know? Tonight was the last show so they let me off early, since I live here and all."

All Hermann said was, "Hmm." Newt ached for more. Was that a good or a bad hmm? Was Hermann interested at all in him or was he just suspicious?

"Sooo, what do you do?" When Hermann didn't answer immediately, Newt added, "For a living. And stuff." He could feel his face heat up. Why did his words always get tangled up when he talked to someone he liked? At least it was dark and Hermann refused to look at him. Hey, at least that became a positive now!

"Cafe in the mornings, odd jobs in the evenings," Hermann said, "classes inbetween. I was actually helping with the merchandise booths tonight."

"Man, where do you find the time to have a life? College is crazy enough."

"Grad school," Hermann huffed. He sounded the right mix of proud, snobby, and exhausted for it to fit.

"Jesus, dude, how are you not dead? I had a hard enough time just with grad school alone." And the band, which had gotten serious somewhere between his fourth and fifth doctorates.

"How are you a graduate?" Hermann asked, a mix between genuine curiosity and annoyed disbelief in his voice.

"Helps to be the second youngest student ever admitted," Newt said, smugness radiating from him. Okay, so he liked the attention that got him. On occasion. So what?

"You're Newton Geiszler?" Hermann sounded even more incredulous. Newt watched his eyebrows jump up. "What are you doing working as - as a crewmember for a band?"

"It was the job I could get and it makes me happy," Newt said, shrugging.

"It's - it's beneath you." Now Hermann somehow managed to sound even more like a prick than he had before. "It's disrespectful to your degrees, it's -"

"Dude, any job is worth respecting, even the ones you don't see or think are important." Newt glared at him. "My dad taught me that. Do you look down on janitors and lunchladies too?"

"My father always said -"

Newt sighed loudly, trying to cut him off. "Look, we're almost there, take this right coming up, okay? And then the right at the second stop sign."

Hermann stared straight ahead, brow furrowed, saying nothing. The silence this time was awkward, heavy with annoyance and contempt. When Hermann finally pulled up in front of Newt's apartment building, he couldn't be more grateful to jump out into the cold night air. He turned and stuck his head back into the car. "Look, uh, s-sorry about that, I guess. Thanks for the ride."

"Apology accepted." Hermann still looked pissed.

"So, uh, see you around." Newt shut the door, trying not to slam it, but it still closed hard. He sighed and walked to his door, fumbling for his keys in the dark. When he finally got in and tumbled into bed, he couldn't sleep, wondering why someone like Hermann would need to work so hard.


	4. Love in a Coffee Shop

So Newt might have spent the next few weeks poking around every coffee shop he could find within a ten-mile radius of the MIT campus. And he might have spent way more time and money than he should have (not that he was hurting for money but it still seemed a bit... superfluous) waiting for shifts to change and to see if a certain someone would show up for morning hours. It took a while, but he finally found the place - Shatterdome Coffee. Maybe it was a play on the Green Monster or something, not that Newt gave a crap about baseball. Or any other sport, really. He took a little joy in pretending it was all one big Godzilla pun anyways.

He'd come back to this place a few times, mostly because the coffee was friggin' amazing - apparently they had a supplier from Lima or Santiago or Manila or something. So Newt walked in for the third time on a Wednesday morning, wondering if they'd start thinking of him as a regular soon and not sure if he liked that, when he saw a familiar face behind the counter.

"Hermann!" he nearly shouted, bounding up to the counter. The other person with him, a young teen with blue hair streaks, glanced up in surprise as she cleaned up dishes. The look on Hermann's face was not so much surprise as - annoyance? Shit. Had he really left that bad an impression?

"What would you like?" he asked. Newt thought he was trying to sound polite, but it came out as more of a growl. Not so good on the social graces thing, then, he could work with that. Not exactly like he was great at people skills either.

“Look, man, whatever I did, I’m sorry,” he said, wondering if he was still upset about the car ride.

“You have nothing to apologize for,” Hermann said, still sounding pissed. “Now can I take your order?”

“Uh, sure, the Typhoon chai,” Newt said, taking a quick glance at the menu board. Everything in here had weird names. He leaned over the counter as Hermann started to put his tea together. “So how’ve you been?”

Hermann paused and glanced at him, scowling. “Fine.”

“Dude, that is like, the worst answer, it is the shut up of polite responses,” Newt said.

“Perhaps you should take a hint.”

“Perhaps you should answer my question,” Newt said. He glanced up when he heard a giggle; the girl working with Hermann was turning away, trying not to show her amusement. She seemed sweet, if quiet and serious, the last few times Newt had been here. Maybe he needed to reassess, especially if she could work with such a sourpants.

“I’ve been doing – doing well,” Hermann said as he poured steamed milk into Newt’s cup.

“I’m doing good,” Newt offered when Hermann didn’t say anything else.

“It looked like it,” Hermann said quietly.

“Dude, what is your problem?” Newt asked. “I thought I’d be nice, and you’re –“

“I was not expecting you to find where I worked,” Hermann said. “I have trouble believing it is a coincidence. Why?”

Newt shrugged. Now there was a question. Why had he spent the last few weeks searching for someone who he’d done a favor for and then just argued with? “’Cause I think you’re interesting.” Hermann stopped walking, nearly dropping the pitcher of chai. “And you need a life, man. How many friends do you have?”

“That is none of your concern,” Hermann said, voice low and growly again. “Now please move, you’re blocking the other customers.”

Newt dropped a five on the counter and walked off, not waiting for his change. He heard the girl say, “You know, he is the first friend of yours to visit,” before he found a table in a back corner to sit at.

He pulled out his tablet, half-heartedly poking out new lyrics and thoughts, but mostly he spent his time watching Hermann, ducking his head down when Hermann turned in his direction. The guy was a bit less stiff with other customers, but not by much. He made up for his customer service with his speed, though. And damn, he was good – Newt couldn’t tell if the chai’s special zing today was because of him or just in Newt’s imagination.

Newt blinked in surprise as he watched Hermann sweep – when he only had to walk a few steps around the coffee bar, it wasn’t very noticeable, but sweeping showed that he had a pronounced limp. Mako came over and tried to take the broom from him, but he just shooed her away, towards some customers who were just coming in. Once she was finished getting their orders, she took the broom from him and finished, going faster than he could. Newt watched him return to the coffee bar, cleaning mugs and wiping counters down, obviously frustrated. What had happened? Hermann couldn’t be much older than him, even if he looked old. Had there been an accident?

But it was rude to speculate. When Hermann walked out from behind the bar, to a door leading to a back room, Newt started to pack his tablet back up. He managed to catch Hermann before he could get back behind the bar. “Hey, would you want to, I dunno, study sometime or something?”

“Aren’t you out of school?” Hermann asked coldly.

“Well, yeah, but you seem a bit too busy for dinner,” Newt joked. He could tell by Hermann’s frown that the guy hadn’t taken it as a goof, the way he’d meant. “Look, do you want to get dinner sometime?”

“A-are you asking me on date?” Hermann asked, cheeks flushing pink.

“Um. Kind of. I guess. It can be a friend date. I’ll pay, don’t worry about it.” He watched Hermann’s face get redder and redder. “Y’know, never mind, I wasn’t –”

“I’m free on Saturday,” Hermann finally said, cutting him off.

“Great! Uh, you pick a place and I’ll give you my number and we’ll meet up there, at, like, 7. 7PM. How does that sound?” Newt said, pulling a napkin – clean, he checked it – from his pocket and writing his number on it.

“I’ll text you later.” Hermann took the napkin and shoved it in his pocket without looking at it.

“Great! I’ll see ya.” He quickly hugged Hermann. The guy wasn’t getting enough love, that was clear. He only let go when he could feel Hermann squirming.


End file.
